Based on a Landmark Study
By Ms. James H. Bray and John
Kelly
(Broadway Books; Hardcover; June 24, 1998; $25.00)
Email
Ms. James H. Bray: jbray@bcm.tmc.edu
Among the project’s most important findings:
A
stepfamily has its own natural lifecycle. Stepfamily
life has three major transition points, two of which throw a
family into temporary crisis: the first year- or year-and-a-half
mark (the most challenging and crucial); the three- to five-year
mark (when families’ identities and patterns are solidified); and
the children’s adolescent years (when the child’s identity needs
to create conflicts or challenges).
A
stepfamily takes several years to develop into a family
unit. Contrary to long-held academic beliefs, a
stepfamily begins to coalesce at the end of the second or third
year, not in six months to a year.
A
stepfamily is a greatest risk during the first three
years. The stepfamily failure rate is very high
during this period. In stepfamilies, marital satisfaction rates
start low, then climb, the opposite of nuclear family rates, which
begin high, then decline.
A
stepfamily must solve four basic tasks in order to
succeed: Integrating the stepparent into the child’s
life, separating former marriages from the present one, managing
change, and finding workable rules for dealing with
non-residential parent and former spouses.
A
stepfamily can help the scars of divorce. The study’s
findings affirm the work of investigators like Ms. Judith
Wallerstein, which shows that a child is profoundly affected by
family dissolution. Contrary to conventional wisdom, however, the
study found that a well-function stepfamily can restore a
youngster’s sense of well-being, as well as nurture healthy value
development as capably as a nuclear family.
A
stepfamily ultimately emerges as one of three basic
forms. These forms, the archetypes of stepfamily
life, are Neotraditional, which succeeds, nearly all of the time;
Matriarchal, successful most of the time; and Romantic, which are
at great risk for divorce.
Call us at:
(212) 877-3244 The Stepfamily Foundation
333 West End
Avenue
New York, NY, 10023
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